[Yo, this is ACTUALLY crazy?]

I just heard this insane track on the radio at the 24/7: https://audiomack.com/song/starlopez5000/balla-bitch
If I had kids, damn, I'd be PISSY! But I don't, so I can shake my ass and rest easy. Pull up in that new new, bitch get a squeegee. 
This is really sick and so is the rest of the album, I really recommend everyone give it a listen (you might even have a shoutout. I know I do! I'm the wh*re referenced in verse 2 of track 8!)

[Wanted: Discreet Male Companion]

Let me preface this by saying that I am by no means a licentious woman, overcome with desire and incapable of restraint. I treat my romantic dalliances like business investments: I think them through thoroughly, weigh pros against cons, and finally once I've mulled it over enough in my mind, I make a tactical decision.

Keeping this in mind, the men I find myself drawn to are no brawny hoodlums. You won't find me eyeing a common bruiser or a stevedore. I'm interested in scintillating conversation. I am myself in possession of a classical education; I know Greek, Latin, natural philosophy and lyrical poetry. I want a man to thrill my mind as much as he does my body. I want my horizons broadened, but I am also insistent upon standing on equal ground with my companions. Mind, not that there have been that many of them. If you must know, I could count them on both hands with several fingers left to spare.

 

With that out of the way, I will make my case. In these cold winter months I've found myself longing for a warm body (attached to an enlightened soul- or is that the other way around?) to wrap myself around. I do not often get sentimental, but there's just something about a gentleman calling upon you that no woman is immune to. Feeling treasured, cherished in that way. Nothing quite compares. In my professional life I am ruthless, curt, to-the-point, often described as rigid and unpleasant, but such are the ways of business. I often offset these qualities in my personal life by taking on the role of a kitten behind closed doors. I want to be prized and lavished with gifts. I want to be the light of one's eyes.

It is with these sentiments in mind that I am making my search for a male companion known. The gentleman must be discreet, on account of my life in the public eye, and my fragile reputation. I do not subscribe to the belief that society must be stratified, and so you will not be rejected on the merit of your social standing. That being said, a man leading a life similar to mine will be favored as I believe we will be mutually encouraged to remain discreet and not partake in dangerous, petty games. 

 

A few notes:

1. you must not mind me looking busted af first thing in the morning)
2. I sometimes experience problems with cash flow, which comes with the territory when you're trading internationally. You will sometimes have to lend me a few bucks (nothing more than $30,000) I promise I'm good for it. My reputation is Teflon. 
3. I'm a devout subscriber of the fruitarian diet (like my peer, the late Steve Jobs GRHS). Listed amongst the common side effects of this diet are fatigue, which fortunately doesn't affect me, and flatulence, which unfortunately does. I do not have much to say about this- you either like it or you do not. I'm told my gaseous releases smell like Victoria's Secret Body Mist if you clench your nostrils just right. 
4. I do not snore, but I might Batista bomb you in my sleep. Fret not, however. I'm sure you have a guest bedroom you can bunk down in. 

 

Nothing is ever for certain, but I hope we can find a common thread and connect. You never know: sparks might fly. If you wish to make your interest known, you can reach my assistant Star at 3333356.

Most sincerely, 
Eve "E.V.E." Ghandhari

[Thomas Voight - Shawty feat. Young Dro (Official Audio)]

Damn.. That Irish fiddle bangs!! Got me pourin Baileys on my titties! 

[Nose was broken after awful attack, need help fixing it!]

Yo Star Blood, I Hope Someone Help's You Out Cause You A Real One And U Deserve Prettyness . ' iM Madd Fukxinnnqq Pissed Pissed That U Got Assaulted . U Dont Deserve That .